september chicago

(from the notebook, undated but a couple of weeks back)

there are birds of prey out the windows– I hear them, ticking in the night– or maybe that's just a cicada winding down– I've been here just over two years– I don't feel settled, I resist it– will I ever feel settled anywhere? where would I fell settled? I do feel calm and right with my darling, but geographically, socially, professionally, just a little bit I am feeling unsettled, wrought, overcaffeinated, despairing, irritable, late, clumsy, hopeful, slouchy, and deliciously, exhaustedly, heart-recklessly, skitteringly, naughtily, snoringly scattered a good deal of the time.

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